Bad Blogger, Bad

so... since im SO bad at keeping up with this blog....

heres another blog im really good at keeping up with:

mustlove.tumblr.com

there at least I will not disappoint!

recipe to a good day

-sunshine

-good music

-swimming in a natural, mountain glacial run off

-hang out at a park

-getting kidnapped

-sonic

-playing in a dandelion field

-playing ninja

-looking up at the starts and playing the "ha-ha" game

-lots of pictures

-dancing in the middle of the highway in a traffic jam at night

Star Gazers

favorite picture of corey btw

Eskimo Kisses

Calm it Down

I havent blogged in awhile-- my apologies.

I would like to say that life here has been quite busy, because it has been... but thats a lame excuse that everyone falls under.

I have this strange desire to just.... sit by someone. Not talk. Just sit, and read or do homework- not the creepy lets stare at eachothers eyes until someone blinks and its so awkward that you cant look away-- no. Just... being. Just resting in the day, resting in yourself, resting in the fact that God is sitting right next to us. That He is in control.

I didnt go to church today, and I feel strange.

Walking with God

Spontaneously, I decided I was going to take a hike today... and by spontaneous... I mean- im going to check my mail and oh while im at it, I think ill go on a hike- kind of spontaneous... So I took my mail (thanks to angie and adrianne who sent me love mail:)) and continued walking.

Now I dont know any of the trails... or where they would be, so I just heard water... and followed it. My new whale rainboot sure came in handy (thanks mom!). Since I was walking through water, and the trails I had encountered were all flooded.

I then proceeded to get lost... But I wasnt worried or anxious about being lost. I was strangely at peace. I just... continued walking, walked in circles. Finally saw some signs but they just told me about the destination... not how I could get back.

So I wandered some more... and I apparently wandered in the right direction and finally hit a trail that I recognized from before and made it back. Started.... 3:30 4ish came back around sundown. Thats an adventure Id like to take again. In all... id like to say I had a.. successful Huck Finn worthy day.

walking...and walking...and walking...

One of the many rivers I came across

Also, please keep my Dad in your prayers... He was diagnosed with Bells Palsy, which is the temporary paralysis of half of his body. Right now he has feeling in his left arm, but his face still isnt working as hed like it to... Its something that naturally goes away on its own.. But its scary. So prayers would be wonderful right now!

I hate that I had to come back so soon... Ride situations got fuzzy... again.. So I had to come back with the next available person, and they happened to be leaving yesterday. I am a little exausted at the way God has been testing me as of late... But as I was reminded, the response to all this testing is to turn to Him. And turn to Him I have done. I am so glad He has control over me... As if im not already a slow motion accident, imagine me steering my life! Praise God, grace like rain... fall on me.

Cant you tell? Im a slow motion accident, lost in the pages

I am so emotionally drained. Can I go home now? I want to hug my family.

I almost didnt have a ride home to Spring Break... With all the kids from Michigan here... you wouldnt think it would be that difficult right? Wrong. After searching, I have finally found a ride to Chicago-- and then from Chicago to Michigan. Thus I will be arriving home around 2:30am Friday morning! Hallelujah.

I have come to the realization... not for the first time, but a continuation of this realization that I have SO many weaknesses... I seem to be debbie downing it lately.

Psalm 69

On a completely seperate note... I think I am going to have a summer project... to learn the Cello... Because I am in the full Belief that the Cello has the most sexiest sound of all times. And I just need to feel useful.

Home is less than 24 hours away.... Lookout Michigan.

Solas Christas

I went to bed with an awful feeling last night... and woke up with it again in the morning. I did not understand, I couldnt comprehend just.... WHY.

So I have been going through a bit of a struggle lately. It came out of nowhere, and without warning. This is what happens when your hold things in. My subconscious attacked me and the anxiety attack ensued. I thought God had left me, to test me. Was I not worshipping Him as I ought? Was I putting something before him? What have I done?

But one of my very good friends pointed Deuteronomy 31:8 to me...

"It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."

its so simple. I feel the fool to not have seen it before, but I was so caught up in my unseen worries and I lost sight of the Truth. Sometimes just being stupid and human is enough to frustrate me. I know we do these things by nature but I hate it so much that it makes me physically ill. I found yet another quote:

"I do not seek to understand that I may believe, but I believe in order to understand. For this I believe-- that unless I believe, I should not understand."

I have learned that being Christian, you learn something new all the time. Whether it something God has driven into out hearts again... breaking it to know Him. Or having the physical evidence and the evidence in our hearts that He is with us. He will NEVER forsake us. This has filled me with SUCH joy. I just... dont know how else to express it. God has blessed me with the best people in my life... and I am just SO greatful for it.

The Greatest of Friends.

I love these people.

Sondre Lerche is my new song love. I dont really mind that hes married :-). Weekend trip to Nashville was absolutely phenomenal... I am so glad that there was a cancelation to make this weekend happen. Words can not express! It needs to be repeated and soon.

Father hide our hearts in you, lest we steal them back and lay them at the feet of man